STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS, a Spoilerpiece Prequel, and an Email from France on Episode #75

STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS poster

Listen as we spoil the shit out of STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS

The guys kick off their STAR WARS episode with a Spoilerpiece prequel: the origin story of Kris Jenson’s love affair with burritos. Thankfully it’s much shorter and funnier than the ones George Lucas did. After that, the guys discuss a very kind email they received from a fan in France. Then they head right into the main event by reviewing STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS, a film which miraculously all of them have seen. All three really like it, so they dig in deep to talk about why they think it works so well. Things get pretty spoilerific, so only tune in if you’ve seen the movie or you can handle it. You’ve been warned.

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IN THE HEART OF THE SEA and the 2015 BOFCA Awards on Episode #74

HEART OF THE SEA

Very different opinions about the whale from IN THE HEART OF THE SEA. Kris was thrilled by it, but Evan, not so much

Dave is back from sick leave to share his unique take on a classic lullaby. Then Evan and Kris jump into reviewing Ron Howard’s IN THE HEART OF THE SEA, or IN THE FART OF THE SEA, as Dave calls it. The film stars the Greater Hemsworth (Chris) and Brendan Gleeson, but not Dave’s favorite actor Ray Winstone. It’s a movie about a sperm whale that kills seamen, and yes the guys milk that fact for all the laughs it’s worth. They also don’t shy away from making CABIN BOY references whenever possible. Probably the biggest surprise is how much Evan and Kris disagree about it. Their conversation veers into a tangent about Ron Howard films, before all three guys get into this year’s Boston Online Film Critics Association (BOFCA) awards. The three of them share their top 10 lists, and delve into some of the categories where they had completely different items in their ballots like Best Foreign Film and Best Documentary. Highlights include PEACE OFFICER, FINDERS KEEPERS, STRAY DOG, and JAFAR PANAHI’S TAXI. Before they sign off, the guys have a few words of appreciation for the marketers giving BOFCA’s awards some attention, and a few choice words for the organization’s critics.

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YOUTH, CHI-RAQ, ROOM, and LEGEND on Episode #73

Youth

YOUTH is bonkers, but Harvey Keitel and Michael Caine give great performances in it.

Unfortunately Dave can’t make it for a full show, but he is able to squeeze in a segment of “Riedel’s Recaps.” All is not lost though, since fan favorite Sean Burns fills in. He and Evan start out by talking YOUTH, a film that they don’t agree on. Evan hates how disjointed it is, while Sean digs how bonkers it is. Then they toss it over to Kris, who breaks down Spike Lee’s CHI-RAQ, which has a happy Wesley Snipes, a surprising John Cusack, and characters speaking in verse. It’s got a lot of super-Spike-Lee stuff that makes Sean super excited to see it. After that Evan and Sean tackle ROOM, another movie they can’t agree on. Sean isn’t a fan of its inconsistent style, but Evan thinks Brie Larson is fantastic and finds its escape scene riveting. Finally, Kris and Sean discuss LEGEND, a crime movie with Tom Hardy that has structure problems and brothers who seem like they’re from different planets. It all ends with tangents about Universal awards season screeners and drunk dialing. Stay tuned though until the very end for a sultry post-ending song surprise.

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CREED, THE GOOD DINOSAUR with bonus PLANES, TRAINS, & AUTOMOBILES, and every ROCKY movie on Episode #72

Creed

CREED is fantastic, and so is Michael B. Jordan.

Happy Thanksgiving! We at Spoilerpiece couldn’t help but launch into a short riff about the beauty of John Hughes’ PLANES, TRAINS & AUTOMOBILES. It’s that time of year, and it’s also funny to hear Steve Martin say, “I do not play with my balls.” Then Kris and Evan get into THE GOOD DINOSAUR, which, to hear them tell it, ain’t a good movie. And finally, Kris spoilerpieces the hell out of CREED, the new ROCKY movie that is apparently better than it has any right to be. There’s also a Henry update and a brief installment of “Riedel’s Recaps.” Hope everyone didn’t eat themselves sick!

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THE HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY – Part 2, THE NIGHT BEFORE, and TRUMBO on Episode #71

Seth Rogen and Jillian Bell in THE NIGHT BEFORE

Nothing like tripping balls in church. Take it from Seth Rogen in THE NIGHT BEFORE.

Somehow, saucy puppet shows and Clippy from MS Word are topics of discussion heading into this week’s episode. Evan and Kris lead things off by talking about THE HUNGER GAMES: MOCKINGJAY – PART 2, which neither of them is particularly enthused about or invested in. As people who aren’t really into the series, they can admit that it’s good for what it is, and that fans will probably enjoy it as a conclusion to the franchise. Then Dave and Kris talk TRUMBO, which Dave claims is a sequel to DUMBO. This HBO movie looks and feels like it belongs on TV. It’s too long and fairly one note, although it does have some good things going on. Lastly, Evan spoilerpieces THE NIGHT BEFORE, a Christmas comedy starring Seth Rogen, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and Anthony Mackie as childhood friends looking for one last epic holiday blowout. Its dramatic elements don’t work and JGL isnt’ believable as the group’s loser, but it does make use of great comedians in small roles. Michael Shannon is its surprise MVP.

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BROOKLYN, LOVE THE COOPERS, COBRA, and BEVERLY HILLS COP on Episode #70

Rags the dog in LOVE THE COOPERS

Oh hey, it’s the narrator from LOVE THE COOPERS….Steve Martin…the dog.

Dave has a gift for Evan and Kris that’s really more of a present for himself, although it does offer a great set up for this episode of 80s Piece…er…Spoilerpiece Theatre. First, Evan shares his thoughts about the dog shit holiday film LOVE THE COOPERS, which features Steve Martin as a canine narrator. Next up is Dave, to talk about BROOKLYN, a movie that’s beautifully acted and looks wonderful, but has several Irish names that he can’t pronounce. However the episode’s main event is that all three of the guys have seen both COBRA and BEVERLY HILLS COP, two pictures that were made under very similar circumstances. In discussing COBRA Kris observes Marion Cobretti’s pornographic glee in dispatching bad guys, Dave sees how it rips off DIRTY HARRY, and Evan notices its odd product placement. They can all agree that BEVERLY HILLS COP knows exactly what kind of movie it is, has amazing improvisation, and features Eddie Murphy walking around, fuckin’ owning every place he goes.

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SPECTRE, SPOTLIGHT, HORROR, and the New York Film Festival on Episode #69

Daniel Craig in the movie SPECTRE

Daniel Craig looks bored as Bond even in this photo from SPECTRE

This week Charlie Nash makes his second Spoilerpiece appearance to share his experiences at the Coolidge Corner Halloween Horror Movie Marathon and the New York Film Festival with Evan and Kris. At the 12-hour movie marathon, which he dubs “a cinephile’s wet dream,” Charlie saw horror films that stimulated his overactive imagination like HALLOWEEN, NIGHT OF THE DEMONS, THE CHANGELING, and THE HITCHER. Also, at the New York Film Festival he watched CAROL and SON OF SAUL, two important movies that he breaks down. Charlie and Kris then take on SPECTRE, the James Bond picture that Kris dubs “more of a postscript than an epilogue” to Daniel Craig’s entries in the franchise. It’s overly long, self-congratulatory, and worst of all—it has a shitty theme song. Thankfully all three of the guys saw SPOTLIGHT, a tremendous film that chronicles the Boston Globe’s report that exposed sexual scandal in the Catholic Church. Not only is it a better Boston movie than BLACK MASS, but SPOTLIGHT is elegant, subtle, and gripping based on its story and the performances by its leads.

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BURNT, OUR BRAND IS CRISIS, and HIDING OUT on Episode #68

Bradley Cooper in BURNT

Bradley Cooper’s character is a total dick in BURNT

Following a brief Eddy mix up, the guys review movies new to old. First up is Evan with BURNT, a Bradley Cooper film about disgraced chef who does not pee in soup. It’s a super predictable picture where there are gratuitous montages that focus on mundane things and everyone is waiting around for him to get better. Kris is next to discuss OUR BRAND IS CRISIS, a political film that’s reminiscent of PCU, but without George Clinton to bring everyone together. The director doesn’t belong and it’s so uneven, although when it’s cynical it does have points to make. Finally, Evan has seen Dave’s favorite movie, HIDING OUT, starring John Cryer, so the two of them give it the full spoilerpiece treatment. Dave can “quote the motherfucker backwards and forwards,” and Evan reveals his surprise about how part of it takes place in Boston, while pausing to analyze its 80s yuppie mentality.

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BEASTS OF NO NATION, THE LAST WITCH HUNTER, and VICTORIA on Episode #67

Thoughtful hipster Vin Diesel with hair in THE LAST WITCH HUNTER

Thoughtful hipster Vin Diesel in THE LAST WITCH HUNTER

The guys have something to say about BACK TO THE FUTURE PART II this week, but it’s not what you’d expect. Once they get that out of their system, Evan covers VICTORIA, which gets Dave speaking German and Franch, yes that’s right, Franch. After a brief tangent on ALIEN and confusion about who is in the movie 88 MINUTES, Evan talks about how VICTORIA takes a while to get going, becomes super tense, and then overstays its welcome. Then Dave jumps in to describe Idris Elba’s cockswagger in Cary Fukunaga’s BEASTS OF NO NATION, a good film also that overstays its welcome, on top of being heavy and horrifying. After that, Kris talks about THE LAST WITCH HUNTER’s magical dismemberment and why he loves Vin Diesel so much. Lastly, Dave stars in a new segment called Riedel’s Recaps, where he offers counterpoints to Kris and Evan’s previous reviews of STEVE JOBS and DRUNK STONED BRILLIANT DEAD.

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BRIDGE OF SPIES, CRIMSON PEAK, STEVE JOBS, and GOOSEBUMPS on Episode #66

Brooklyn lawyer James Donovan (Tom Hanks) meets with his client Rudolf Abel (Mark Rylance), a Soviet agent arrested in the U.S. in DreamWorks Pictures/Fox 2000 PIctures' dramatic thriller BRIDGE OF SPIES, directed by Steven Spielberg.

BRIDGE OF SPIES is tense, good-humored, and committed to its main character.

Dede Crimmins sets a new record with her fourth appearance as a Spoilerpiece guest. Fresh off her trip to Fantastic Fest, she fills Evan and Kris in on her favorite films from the fest: THE LOBSTER, HIGH-RISE, GREEN ROOM, and SOUTHBOUND. Then the three of them talk about CRIMSON PEAK, which is beautiful, creepy, and fully-conceived. After that Dede shares her thoughts on GOOSEBUMPS, a movie for kids and big kids like Evan who read the books growing up. Next Kris tackles STEVE JOBS, which is directed by Danny Boyle, the first person to direct at the speed Aaron Sorkin writes. Finally, Evan and Kris close out the show with BRIDGE OF SPIES, a picture that’s tense, good-humored, and committed to its character.

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