LEAVING NEVERLAND, SURVIVING R. KELLY, AFTER LIFE, AND BORDER on Episode #244

We’ve been busy at Spoilerpiece! After doing a not-so-deep dive into the power of cocaine in 1980s rap-rock fusions, Evan, Kris, and Dave get down to what they saw this week. First is Dave with Ricky Gervais’ Netflix series “After Life” (2:32). (Note: Dave makes reference to Mel Gibson’s THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST at about the 11:30 mark, but mistakenly calls it THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST which is Martin Scorsese’s hot take on whether Jesus was a hippie.) At 15:47, Evan covers SURVIVING R. KELLY and LEAVING NEVERLAND, two documentaries about accusations of abuse by R. Kelly (the answer’s in the title) and Michael Jackson. We’re not really a podcast for trigger warnings, but it’s heavy, heavy stuff. Lastly, Kris talks about BORDER (36:30), a Swedish movie about a customs agent who can smell fear, and that’s just the beginning. To end things, the guys have a quick discussion about how to tell non-critics whether to see a particular film (45:40).

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HE NAMED ME MALALA, DRUNK STONED BRILLIANT DEAD, and TWIXT on Episode #65

Malala in HE NAMED ME MALALA

Malala is such an inspiration. It’s a shame her documentary is so patronizing.

Kris and Evan fly duo this week since Dave can’t make it, but at least he’s able to call in and share a strange dream he had. After Evan and Kris ponder its meaning, they dive into this week’s movies. Kris starts off by reviewing the documentary HE NAMED ME MALALA, which disappointingly patronizes its subject. Then Evan talks about the documentary DRUNK STONED BRILLIANT DEAD, a funny, fast-moving movie with great music that recounts the history National Lampoon Magazine. Finally, both of them discuss TWIXT, a bizarre film by Francis Ford Coppola that neither of them knew about until they watched it on Netflix. They quickly discovered why. It’s just a strange flick that baffles them for a million reasons. Tangents this week include Crean family holiday movies and actors who are difficult to work with.
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THE MARTIAN, THE WALK, and TIME OUT OF MIND on Episode #64

Matt Damon in THE MARTIAN

Matt Damon is the most natural he’s ever been in THE MARTIAN

Bob Chipman aka The Movie Bob fills in for Dave, who is unfortunately absent due to dental work this week. Bob reminisces with Evan and Kris about movies named after job titles before jumping into conversation about THE MARTIAN. All three of them saw it, and all three agree it’s a great film. Evan’s a bit disappointed by some aspects of the book that were cut, but Kris loves that it lets scientists be scientists and Bob hopes that it inspires a million kids to go to space camp. Then Bob and Evan discuss THE WALK, a film that features Joseph Gordon-Levitt as a cartoonish Frenchman. Both thought they might hate it, so they were pleasantly surprised by how much they dug its playful nature. And last but not least, Evan briefly reviews Oren Moverman’s TIME OUT OF MIND, which makes a great statement about homelessness, even though nothing really happens in it.
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BLIND, THE INTERN, THE SECOND MOTHER, SICARIO, and STONEWALL on Episode #63

People in Stonewall the movie

Roland Emmerich’s STONEWALL throws bricks at historical accuracy.

Dave makes a historic Spoilerpiece proclamation! But first Evan and Kris tease their coverage of THE MARTIAN by telling Dave about the book. It’s a busy day on the show with lots of ground to cover. Kris starts off by sharing what fucking disaster Roland Emmerich’s STONEWALL is and how it insultingly makes up facts. Then Dave gives his first positive review of the week in describing Regina Casé’s beautiful performance in THE SECOND MOTHER. Evan’s up next to spoilerpiece Dave and Kris into wanting to see Denis Villeneuve’s suspenseful film SICARIO. Dave jumps in after that with a (gasp) second positive review to describe the good mind fuckery of BLIND and finally, Evan talks about why he thinks De Niro’s performance in THE INTERN might be his best of the millennium.

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BLACK MASS, THE BLACK PANTHERS: VANGUARD OF THE REVOLUTION, and GRANDMA Revisited on Episode #62

Johnny Depp in Black Mass

Kris says Johnny Depp’s peformance is good DESPITE his makeup in BLACK MASS

Dave is back this week to offer his take on GRANDMA, which echoes Sean’s sentiments about the film. Then he goes back to hating on Joe Swanberg for DIGGING FOR FIRE and derides Mumblecore movies in general, before Evan and Kris review the Johnny Depp Whitey Bulger film BLACK MASS. Kris thinks Depp’s performance is good despite his makeup and Evan agrees since he found several scenes chilling. Overall they spend a lot more time discussing better gangster movies like THE DEPARTED and GOODFELLAS, which should tell you something. Dave wraps everything up by talking about the documentary THE BLACK PANTHERS: VANGUARD OF THE REVOLUTION, which he says is a bit one-sided, but totally watchable and really well-done.

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THE VISIT, GRANDMA, and 90 MINUTES IN HEAVEN on Episode #61

Olivia DeJonge in THE VISIT

PUT DOWN the damn camera girl and grab a weapon to use against your Nana

Sean Burns joins Evan and Kris this week, vowing to up the episode’s profanity quotient since he’s filling for Dave. But Evan does a pretty good job of that himself, cursing out M. Night Shyamalan’s found footage horror film THE VISIT. Although Evan can’t stand the movie, Kris doesn’t actually hate everything about it and manages to sell Sean on seeing it. After they get through that slog, Sean talks about how entertaining Lily Tomlin is in GRANDMA and how crazy it was seeing her around Sundance with Jane Fonda. Then he wraps everything up with 90 MINUTES IN HEAVEN, the boring Christian film that stars Hayden Christensen with a creepy mustache and drawl. How boring is it? Sean needed three tries to get through it without falling asleep. Given its lack of excitement, it’s not surprising that the guys end up hitting a number of tangents instead of discussing the movie in depth.

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WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS, 10,000 SAINTS, and DIGGING FOR FIRE on Episode #59

Zac Efron in WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS

Zac Efron doesn’t play a young Robert Loggia in WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS, but that would be much better than this movie.

The guys open this week’s episode with a discussion on Deez Nuts’s candidacy for president. Then Kris and Evan rip into WE ARE YOUR FRIENDS, which they agree does NOT star Zac Efron as a young Robert Loggia. Their agitated commentary is enough to leave Dave “slack-jawed and open-mouthed.” After Kris expresses confusion over more celebrities (this time Brian Austin Green and Ian Ziering), Dave takes over to share his thoughts on two fucking horrible movies. First up is TEN THOUSAND SAINTS, where the most interesting character dies 15 minutes in and Ethan Hawke plays almost the same character he did in BOYHOOD. Second is DIGGING FOR FIRE, one of the whitest movies Dave has ever seen. Joe Swanberg’s film is about dull white people with dull white people problems, and it’s so bad that it makes Dave’s soul die a little bit.

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AMERICAN ULTRA, THE GIFT, CALL ME LUCKY, and PEOPLE PLACES THINGS on Episode #58

Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Steward in American Ultra

This picture is way cooler than anything that happens in AMERICAN ULTRA.

Movies like woah on this week’s Spoilerpiece. First, Evan teases the book about ‘80s films that he’s been working on with his friend Bryan Krull, prompting a deeper conversation on ‘80s movies. Then Dave shares his thoughts on THE TRIBE because he finally saw it. Evan’s up next to talk about how THE GIFT subverts expectations, before Dave goads him into spoiling the movie’s big twist. After that, Evan and Kris discuss why they weren’t fans of AMERICAN ULTRA (hint: it’s about a stoner secret agent and plotted like a stoner wrote it). Dave follows up by quickly exploring why PEOPLE PLACES THINGS is so sluggish and by-the-numbers. And last, but not least, Kris reviews CALL ME LUCKY, a great documentary by Bobcat Goldthwait about Boston comedian and activist Barry Crimmins.

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THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E., PHOENIX, and STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON on Episode #57

Henry Cavill and Armie Hammer on a scooter in THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E.

Henry Cavill and Armie Hammer during one of the best scenes in THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E.

Dave is back again on this week’s Spoilerpiece (which makes two weeks in a row)! The fellas talk about silly t-shirts they wish they could own, including one in particular that Kris wanted as a kid. Then the guys take on a bumper crop of movies. Kris and Evan are up first with their thoughts on Guy Ritchie’s hyper-styled adaptation of THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E., which has a great performance by Armie Hammer and one of the worst car chases Kris has ever seen. Dave delivers praise for PHOENIX, while wondering what the plural of the word is (phoenices?). Once he’s done talking up the film’s perfectly composed photography, interesting post-World War II story, and its Hitchcock-ian flavor, Evan and Kris round things out with STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON. Both of them discuss why they love the movie (because fuck the po-lice) and how its casting is fantastic.

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FANTASTIC FOUR, SHAUN THE SHEEP, RICKI AND THE FLASH, and THE STANFORD PRISON EXPERIMENT on Episode #56

FANTASTIC FOUR poster

This poster is more exciting than the entire movie of FANTASTIC FOUR

On this week’s episode Kris shares his plans to weaponize peeing babies with Dave and Evan, before Evan tears FANTASTIC FOUR a new one. The film is terrible in many ways, but Evan just can’t let go of one particularly obnoxious plot hole. After the three of them engage in some Tenacious D-inspired swearing, Dave talks about SHAUN THE SHEEP, a delightful movie that everyone should see. Kris then discusses how Meryl Streep’s Republican grocery store cashier safely rebels through rock music in the confusing RICKI AND THE FLASH. Somehow that leads to Dave and Evan singing about squirrels. Finally, Evan closes everything out with THE STANFORD PRISON EXPERIMENT, a picture that would work better as a documentary, rockumentary, or shockumentary than the flat, repetitive narrative that it is. For some reason all the roads lead back to urine and squirrels in this episode.

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